GUNTHROAT

After some serious introspection I have come to the conclusion that, I am being a coward in not writing what is happening with my life for the past 6 months. I am sure there will be atleast one thing in this blog that will be unknown to my regular readers.

So let me start with the most painful exercise of writing down an account of the harrowing first half of 2009, I had. It all started with a dismal 1500th rank in JMET in the beginning of January. I hoped that I would get a better rank and the result obviously irritated me. If I thought that was the worst it can get, a lot more was in the offing. I could virtually see my metamorphosis into an object of disgrace to everyone around me. I started to hate everything around me, everyone who loved and cared for me. Sometimes I would pick up a fight with completely childish things with my father. I started getting offended easily especially in conversations with my sister. I didn’t have the guts to talk to gopi chacha who took care of me like a son during my days in Bangalore. I failed him completely and that made me hate myself more than anything else.

Then I applied for civil services and didn’t get the acknowledgement card for my application. So I thought my application somehow got rejected and started the dreamless slumber which continues till date. Mindtree had given me the joining date as April 13th but they extended it to October with reduced salary. Then I thought CTS would call me but they too gave me a distant December 28th as the joining date. After Mindtree fiasco Lakshman convinced me to take up a partime job in Time. Half heartedly I decided to go for it.

The first interview in Time was on February 14th the Valentine’s Day. I reached Ernakulam, but the person supposed to interview me was having a meeting till noon. So nowhere to go I went to the marine drive and started reading a book. It was the longest 4 hours of my life. Finally I was called well past noon and was interviewed. The head of time centre told me to come and take a mock class later that week. Around the same time I had a big fight with one of my family members pertaining to an appointment that I missed for the planning of my cousin’s marriage. So with a really troubled mind I took a mock class in Time and I was relieved when I heard that I got the assignment as a part time faculty. Lakshaman insisted on telling it to my parents and I hesitatingly allowed it which later proved to be a big mistake. From that day started my long wait for a call from a Time. But they never called. Lakshman had also asked whether I was willing to take Maths for engg entrance. I told him I have forgotten all the 12th standard maths and I would like to talk to the concerned faculty before reaching a decision. Quite surprisingly the entrance wallahs called me and told me to come over. After 5 mock classes (they called it procedure) and orientation sessions (which inspired me whether to apply for call centres rather than attending maths classes), I was given a schedule of sessions I had to take. One and a half months I taught and positively hated teaching something which was retrogressive for my career. The only silver lining was the pay cheque (actually a decent amount because I had 5 day weeks and was paid per hour in a 6 hour workday). Finally when I got the cheque, I ran to the bank to cash it. It was going to be the best moment in 2009. But bad luck stuck again when I found that it was a crossed cheque and the money could be taken only through my account. The only account I had was in Trivandrum, a joint account with my father in district treasury. The most inefficient bank in the whole financial world took exactly 24 days to process my cheque and let me smell my first salary. If that wasn’t enough the classes in time ended after Kerala entrance and I was unemployed again. When I came back my sister convinced me to study something and joined CCDS for civil service coaching the same place which I was planning to join exactly one year ago and decided not to because of my ‘tentative’ joining dates.

Asha told me to do some certification course and I joined SCJP programme again after 2 years and nearly 6000 already spend. SCJP brings back memories of times spent in KR bakes and Shawarma places under the pretext of learning java. Finally the six of us who joined the course unanimously decided to discontinue it after it was proven that we were too busy with enjoying our college days to attend classes every day. I had to pay for the course this time because I felt it was absolutely deplorable for even a monster like me to ask my father to pay for the same course twice. I know that my friends will call me and mock me the moment they see this post. But all I have to say in my defence is my situation demands all that is remotely necessary to fetch me a job. I would have laughed if I was asked to do a course like this 1 year ago, but I really don’t remember the old me.

So in the morning from 6 30 I sit in classes of perverted narcissists (with few exceptions) bragging on and on about their knowledge and vision of life. Then I go to a centre to learn java from a squinted woman who it seems was my worst enemy in my previous life. She caters a bag full of prejudice towards me and I hate her with the same intensity that she hates me. I am impressed by my tenacity which helped me survive 20 days under her debilitating presence. But I expect a bitter showdown in the near future.

So that is pretty much my life now. At this moment I would like to thank my family (especially Asha), two of my all time friends Hari and Lakshman for being there and never hurting me. Also the only happy moments in 2009 were sreejith chettan's marriage and the fun I had with my cousins after it. I don’t know how I would have managed without these great people. Looking back I see myself lucky to have friends who are there for me when I need them most. There will be 100 men to say cheers to you but there will be only a few to bring a cheer on your face.

The endorsement and support given to the Khilafat Movement(for reinstating the caliphate in Turkey) by the Congress remains the turning point in Indian History. It was this event which chained the Indian Muslim forever to the complex global Islamic Diaspora. Khilafat movement became the catalyst for pro Pakistani agitations across the country. Whenever a political party in India brings up an emotional issue(but mostly irrelevant) to gain political mileage among a particular community it sets the stage for turbulent times ahead. History has shown us numerous examples of catastrophic consequences of pampering the religious right. America learned it the hard way with experiences in Afghanistan, iran and Iraq. India learned it with the Shah bano case and subsequent demolition of Babri masjid. But I wonder why the erudite and sensible men of communist party made the same mistake in the 2009 loksabha elections in kerala. It was one of those campaigns which made me sick. I saw more posters of Palestine refugees and tasleema nasreen in ernakulam than the vypeen water issue or the infrastructure woes of cochin city. An extremist who was famous for his inflammatory speeches against the hindus was paraded for all the campaigns of the Marxist party (I don’t want to call him a terrorist like the media here, as it is not proved, but he is a fundamentalist for sure). The Marxist party stooped to despicable depths to woe Muslim mind. They called the nuclear deal anti muslim, they brought in Iran issue to garner votes while easily forgetting the price raise issue, the security lapses which resulted in bomb blasts across the country.

I expected a Hindu backlash in kerala like the way it happened against the congress in 87( after shah bano case) . But something interesting happened. Muslims at large voted against this unsolicited sponsorship of communist party for their fight against global isolation. Muslim mind in kerala was mature enough to understand that if they fall for this appeasement politics they will be further isolated from the society. Last time when they fell for appeasement from the congress party after Shah Bano case, a scourge was born which slowly divided the Indian society and painted Muslims as terrorists. Last time when they voted for petty appeasement politics they got BJP, they didn’t want to create another one. I salute all the muslims who voted against this outrageous communal politics.

A candidate of CPM who lost this time once compared Mata Amritanandamayi, a popular spiritual leader to Silk Smitha(the actress famous for her skin show in movies). Though I am not a follower of Amritananadamayi, I was wounded by this open desecration of a Hindu Symbol by a prominent leader. The party leaders used to openly offend priests (of all religions) by using very bad language till very recently.

This time the whole dynamics changed. A young Turk famous for her vandalism during the days of CPM’s crusade against self financing colleges in Kerala shamelessly visited every Bishop houses (the de jure owners of the self financing colleges she attacked) in her constituency seeking votes. She created 3 orkut accounts to ask votes comfortably forgetting that her party used to conduct strikes against computers. When CPM put up posters of her opponent having dinner with tasleema nasreen, her opponents put up posters of her garlanding Tasleema. One question that remains is who in Kerala really care what Tasleema writes???? .This Young Turk’s opponent who is considered as one of the most influential leaders among power brokers in Delhi became a central minister after his electoral success. A funny rumour that I heard about this minister was when another wannabe congress candidate (who came up from the students wing of congress) went to Delhi with multiple recommendation letters from Bishops of Kerala, the central Minister went with just one letter to the party high command and that letter was from the Pope. But I can’t vouch for the veracity of this rumour. Finally as a cherry on the top of the sundae of hypocrisy, another communist party in Kerala conducted a shilanyas for the spiritual Guru of the prominent Nair community in a private property reminiscing the days of ramajanmabhoomi movement. This happened in the capital city when the communist party junior finding that their incumbent MP was more interested in football commentary and movie acting fielded a candidate with the right surname to attract the majority caste. But soon they found out that simply a surname won’t fetch votes for a person put up against a scholar who got doctorate at the age of 22. So they took up a dormant issue, the demand to create a memorial at the birth place of the majority community’s spiritual leader. But interestingly once the Communist party leader took up the issue every party leader including the scholar fawned at the might of this community. But for those who dreamt of making kerala a laboratory of caste and communal politics like Bihar or Gujarat, met with the same fate of the Behenji who thought erecting Ambedhkar memorials (sometimes her own statues) translates to electoral success.

So hats off to malayali you showed the world once again that you are different............